at first thought, the rain somehow lent the season a rather melancholic feel. but as i looked up from the book i was reading, i began to realise that the rain brought a kind of calmness that you don't expect from a thunderstorm. somehow the torrents of rain made me feel like i was the last person on earth. that there wasn't anyone around that might hurt me. made me feel like i had not a care in the world.

the weather took a respite, but later on, in the car at half past three in the morning on the way home, the clouds burst once more, this time with greater affliction. with the flurry of downpour falling in sheets on the windscreen; not being able to see more than 5 feet; with scattered reflections off bodies of water on the road; while the sturdy branches of the tree sway unsteadily, fighting against the relentless and lamenting wind; the tires skidding not less than 5 times, making me lose control, momentarily, of my car; passing a wrecked car at the side of the highway - all these brought a bit of fear, and yet brought a bit of tranquility. fear and tranquility do not go together, but yet at that moment they seem to coexist almost as if it was natural.

the rain brought danger but it seemed to wash away other fears at the same time. like taking a shower. we all take showers when we feel dirty. the torrent brought vulnerability but made me feel invulnerable. it covered the place with gloom, but yet it comforted me. the skies seemed to be grieving, but in a way it was a relief.

if you listened carefully enough, you could almost hear a requiem in the background, as if the rain was playing a death song. but then you could just as well have imagined a happier tune. not an euphorically enraptured joyous tune, but a gentle gratified tune enough to make you feel comfortable, ample to make you feel cozy... maybe even made you feel love. what kind of wicked fool feels love alone in a thunderstorm. well i did. perhaps you will too if you took a pause to look around you and let your mind wander.

somehow thunderstorms make us all feel alone. make us think more. make us feel more. i think this as the most apt way to begin christmas.



(on a completely different note, here's a video of i wish it would rain down i thought i would share with u guys. love the song. love you guys. its by phil collins featuring Eric Clapton.)


- such great heights.